i saw you the other day. i saw you through a rain soaked stretch of dirty pavement, that had once been littered with the tools that were used to destroy someones mind. the rain's intentions were to wash the unclean away, but i still saw the past.
sometimes i see you in things that disrupt my smile, and its funny, because sometimes i even see you in the way my name is screamed for everybody to hear and you don't even care. i thought about summer the other day, and how fast good things have to end, and all i could think about was you. and the way you always said my name in a way i thought was special, but you liked the way it sounded because you knew that you had me. i thought about the way you liked to tell me that i was not among this world, but more, and you only said that because you didn't want to look back. then i thought about its rare numbered occurences, but i knew it was you that wanted that. and what hurt the most, was thinking about the way i ran into your standstill, and you didn't seem to mind me disturbing. but then it was too much, too much for you, to handle. and you thought it would be all okay, because it was too much, for me, just in a different way, but i'm stronger then you, darling. i could have handled it. i could have handled it until,
i saw you in that look she gave me before she even knew anything. and then i remembered the way i couldn't look at you the same, even though i wanted it, in anger, so much, but i couldn't, because i wasen't that strong enough and you seemed to think your words were reasurring, even after you had picked up and moved someplace else.
but as piercing as that look was, and how much truth it showed me, it was nothing like the other day when i saw her and i gave her that look back. because, now you should know, we're even now.