I've been looking alot at stuff of the past. The ultimate theme was being broken down until there was none of me left. And i've realized the significance, I could not exist the way I do today without that breaking time. Without that time where life seemed like it had no end, and everything seemed grey and I just wanted nothing but to disappear.
I don't mean to say that I'm over it. There are times when life seems grey, when I want to put an end to something that seems like it will go on forever, when I want to disappear. I get it alot, lately. But I understand that it comes with the season. And that, it will pass. And theres something that shines its light down on me (even if its dim sometimes) to find my way in the dark... God.
I want to so much, pursue a life thats anything thats worthy to Him, but I fail, again and again. It seems like all I do is fail lately.
Tomorrow im returning to a place where people don't fail. I don't think I'm ready.